Overindulging is a habit

I did it again. I ordered food, and instead of going healthy I went with what tastes good. Crab Rangoon, Beef Teriyaki, and Boneless Spare ribs, of course with some fried rice. If that wasn't bad enough I didn't finish when I was full, I just kept going. It's the same routine, if we're ordering food I go with taste, luckily we don't order out often. But this is still something that I need to change, the idea that I deserve a treat when we eat out has to stop. Why isn't the treat of not cooking enough? I need to make it enough, I can make this change.

On the small victories side of things I did eat well up until dinner. I also managed to not finish up my Chinese food feast with a Nutter Butter, I stared at it, thought about, and almost decided to say screw it. I mean, come on, I just ate all that other crap, what's a few more calories, and a bit more fat? I ate Jello instead. I read a quote once, and I have no idea who it's by, or how exactly it went, but it was to the effect, "Dieting/being healthy/exercising is like brushing your teeth. If you forgot to do it today, you're not going to say screw it tomorrow. You're going to get up and brush your teeth again." That helped me choose Jello over the Nutter Butter, because I truly do want to make changes.

Now for my embarrassing secret. I put fat free Cool Whip on the Jello. I think Cool Whip is disgusting, the fact that it's manufactured just gives me the creeps. But I still eat it. Which is completely hypocritical of me because I would NEVER let my kids eat the crap. I keep it hidden in the freezer, out of the sight of my kids, and any person who may stop by and open my freezer. I was raised on good old fashioned whipped cream, typically made from heavy whipping cream; so how could I harbor fat free Cool Whip in my freezer!?! It's not something I'm proud of, and is another thing I plan on changing in order to become healthier; eating less preservatives, and manufactured crap. But I'm taking baby steps here, so for the time being I will continue to hide Cool Whip in my freezer and occasionally eat it on my Jello basking in the glory of not having eaten the Nutter Butter.